Ten Keys to Dealing with Difficult People

A few years ago I was interviewing for a position in a new church when a board member asked ‘How are you at dealing with difficult people?’ Like all churches they had a few. Dealing with them became one of the greatest discipleship challenges of my life.

In the process of dealing with them I learned a couple of things. Some of them are included below.

  1. Recognize that you’re one of them. God hasn’t put you there because you’ll do everything right but He has confidence in you.
  2. Recognize that it will take time. Habits don’t change over night.
  3. Discipline yourself to take the time.  Difficult people, like difficult problems only get worse when they’re ignored.
  4. Deal with problems quickly before they have an opportunity to spread.
  5. Deal with people carefully, recognizing that any thing you say may be used against you, (in a court of law or anywhere else).
  6. Protect yourself. Doctors wear gloves, masks, even hasmat suits to protect themselves. Guard your attitude.
  7. Ask God to show you the good stuff. If He’s there, He’s working.
  8. Affirm it. You’re not the only one tempted to give up.
  9. Confront the bad diligently, lovingly and consistently.
  10. When you’ve done all you can for today, leave them in the hands of God. He cares about them far more than you do and He is able to do more than you imagine. 

Dealing with difficult people is the hard work of discipleship. I’d love to hear what you’ve learned on the subject. Please, leave your comments below